A Thousand Emotions and No Way to Express Them
by faithfully yours forever
Summary: One girl, one boy, two exes, a car, and a culmination of volatile emotions, hormones, and impulsive actions, and you've got one crazy Christmas journey. But maybe, just maybe, you've also got the undeniable chemistry between two teenage lovers. Late story upload, my first multichapter story, and yet another MASSINGTON love story. R&R? Dedicated to Tess AKA thosebluegreeneyes.
1. When the Chemicals React

**Faith here. :D Happy [**_**very **_**belated] New Year! I wrote this a while ago, but I'm posting it up late because…I am a horrible person. :P I have no excuse other than I'm a horrible procrastinator. Anyway, I hope 2012 is treating all of you well (especially since we're like six months into it already… :P). :D**

**Just a little idea that popped into my head. I admit, I read **_**Ex-Mas**_** by Kate Brian right before I wrote this, so it is heavily based off of that book, but I definitely added my own Faith changes here and there. It's most definitely AU, and Massie-centric. Oh, and instead of living in Westchester, they live in New York, New York! It makes figuring out the driving so much easier (because Westchester's not an actual city, but a county).**

**This story is disclaimed; the characters (with the exception of Matthew Block and Connor Harrington) belong to Lisi Harrington, and **_**Ex-Mas**_** belongs to Kate Brian.**

**Read, and I hope you enjoy!**

**Dedicated to the Tesserific and the Tesstastic Tess (**_**thosebluegreeneyes**_**) because I've missed her and she's an amazing friend/writer!**_**  
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**xxxxx**

**A Thousand Emotions and No Way to Express Them**

_**Chapter One: "When the Chemicals React"**_

**xxxxx**

Massie Block wanted to shoot herself. Actually, she wanted to shoot the dirty blonde soccer player who was scornfully looking at her, when he was supposed to be looking at the road. But of course, Derrick Harrington was being his stupid, arrogant, cocky, smartass self and enjoying pissing Massie off. One hand nonchalantly on the steering wheel and one hand one his lap; one eye on the road and one eye glaring the perfected "I'm-so-much-better-than-you" scowl toward her, he was practically reeking in condescension.

"I honestly don't understand what _the fuck_ you were thinking. Honestly, did you ever think about what would happen after you put the idea that _Santa Claus was in fucking danger_ in his head?"

"Oh, yea, because you know, I should have known that telling my eight year-old brother that global warming was melting the ice caps would have led to him running away to the North _fucking_ pole, because you know, I'm a fucking fortune teller with psychic abilities. I'm so sorry I don't have your ability to see into the beyond, Derrick," Massie spat sarcastically, hot anger rushing through her body. "And besides, it's not like we don't know where they're going. You have a print-out of the train tickets and Google printout of where they're heading to: on the New York Amtrak toward Ottawa in _Ontario fucking Canada_."

"I swear, Massie you're a fucking self-centered bitch," Derrick spat out bitterly. "Honestly, you endanger your little brother – and mine too – all because your brother ruined your little road trip with Alicia and Dylan. Way too fucking go. Now, we don't know where the hell they are, and we have exactly forty-eight hours to find them before our parents come back from their vacations. Good fucking job, little Miss Everything-Revolves-Around-Me!"

Massie narrowed her amber eyes angrily. _Of course, __everything__ was her fault. Because you know, Matthew Block was a little angel and Massie Block was a fucking juvenile delinquent. And of course, Derrick Harrington was absolute perfection, and Massie was the spawn of the devil. _"Excuse me, who was the one who was supposed to be _watching_ our brothers? I dropped him off in your supposed 'capable' hands and of course, you go off to watch a stupid soccer game and they run away. FYI Derrick, babysitting means watching the kids, not sitting on them while you watch another stupid Beckham score," she snapped.

"Says the girl who probably spends hours on the phone while she's supposed to be watching them," Derrick retorted lividly. "I've let them run around the house without checking on them plenty of times before, and they've never tried to _run away to the fucking North Pole before_. In fact, this is the first time, either of them have ever done anything remotely rebellious. Why? Because Matt got hit by 'Whirlwind Massie.'"

"Oh, so it's all my fucking fault. As usual. You know, Derrick, do you honestly think Beckham is going to care that you watch his games every fucking day? _No_. So stop trying to blame me, when it's just as much your fault."

"Really? Care to explain, Miss High-And-Mighty?" Derrick said in a falsely sweet voice.

"Maybe because you were sitting on your ass idolizing some British guy who's never going to notice you, when you could've been watching them. Maybe then you could've stopped them. But nooooooooo, you were watching, trying to feel as though Beckham would've appreciated when he obviously does _not_."

"You know what, Massie?"

"What?" Massie said, imitating his earlier honey-sweet voice.

"_Shut. The. Fuck. Up,_" Derrick threatened lowly, his eyes darkening, his mouth twisting into a rare scowl.

"I will once you will."

And they drove in stony silence the rest of the way.

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**xxxxx**

**So, how'd you like it? Was is good or horrible? Press the little review button and let me know! I'll love you forever if you review! Ch. 2 should be up in a week…I promise! :D Also, be sure to check out my new poll on my profile. I'd love to know your opinion!**

**Also, I'd like your opinion here. We all know I love to post long, rambly, oneshot stories...but do you guys like my shorter chapters multichapter stories better? Let me know! And sorry for the late posting…yea… :P**

**Thanks everyone! I love you all! Mwah!**

**Love and smiles from Faith! :D**


	2. A Little Too Not Over You

**Don't kill me. I know I'm uploading this really late… but… I've been busy with high school graduation, and getting ready for college, and what not…**

**Okay, okay…I have no real excuse. I'm sorry. But in compensation, I've laso uploaded two other **

_**Anyway….**_

…**So, here's Chapter 2, as I promised. Thanks for all of the reviews from Chapter 1. It really made my day. I hope you all like this chapter. I think it's a piece of crap…but read and review, anyway? For me?**

**Anyway, I'll stop talking now. Once again, everything is ****disclaimed****, and I hope you all enjoy this chapter and review!**

**xxxxx**

**A Thousand Emotions and No Way to Express Them**

_**Chapter Two: "A Little Too Not Over You"**_

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Thirty minutes later, Derrick was cursing faster than the speed of light, alternating between cursing at Massie and cursing at the downtown New York traffic.

"Fuck you, you slimy little piece of shit, who the fuck taught you to fucking drive? Because that's not driving, you asshole of a bastard, go back to fucking Ohio," Derrick yelled, slamming his fist angrily on the horn, his cheeks a rare bright red, his caramel eyes filled with annoyance, hatred, and irritation.

"You need to calm the _fuck_ down," Massie said airily, looking out of the window into the bright sun setting into the New York skyline. She knew that Derrick was probably going to start screaming his arrogant head off at her any moment, but she could take his cursing. What she could not take was how often he slammed his strong hands on that horn; it was driving into her last nerve.

Derrick turned his angry expression onto her and his mouth twisted into a deeper scowl, if that was at all possible. Massie rolled her eyes, and waited. _One, two, three, aaaaanddd…._

"Calm the fuck down? Do you even hear yourself? We're stuck here in bumper to bumper traffic, when our brothers are out there, running around like hobos, _thanks to your fucking bitch mode_. And, not to mention, we only have forty-eight hours to find them, and we're stuck here in _fucking bumper-to-bumper traffic!_"

"We live in fucking _New York_. It's fucking crowded, even on a normal day! Plus, FYI, it's December twenty-third, during _rush hour._ People are rushing their asses to see the 'city that never sleeps' like the ignorant people they are! Of course, traffic would be bumper-to-fucking-bumper; what on earth were you expecting? For traffic to magically disappear for you? Because you're Derrick Harrington? You aren't that special, Derrick," Massie scoffed haughtily, meeting his angry glare with her perfected deadpan stare.

"Massie, I swear, if you don't shut the fuck up I will –"

"You'll what? Swear at me like a truck driver?"

"I'll personally tear out every single one of your curls from the top of your head and –" Derrick slammed onto the brakes as an ancient Volvo cut in front of him. "Watch the fuck where you're fucking going you fucking asshole of a bastard! Go back to driving school; there's such a thing as using a goddamn fucking ass blinker, you piece of ass-shit!"

Massie stared at her ex-boyfriend incredulously. "_Ass-shit__?_ What the fuck is an _ass-shit_?"

Derrick glanced at her and his eyes flashed dangerously. "It's what you'll be if _you don't shut the fuck up._"

Massie narrowed her eyes. She was about to cuss out the arrogant bastard, when she suddenly lurched forward in her seat as Derrick slammed the brakes again.

Derrick pounded the horn yet again, and let out a string of cursing that would make even the vilest of all pirates blush. "_I fucking hate traffic__!_" he roared, shooting the darkest of glares toward Massie.

"Well, I have no idea how to help you with that," the amber-eyed brunette said airily, loosening her seat belt strap, which had choked her momentarily in the fast braking.

Derrick glowered at her, and then switched the car into reverse. Shaking out of her light and relaxed mood, Massie glanced at him sharply. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Getting us out of traffic," Derrick remarked, quickly switching into the outer lane and cutting off the Range Rover behind him. Honks filled the air, but Derrick ignored them and swerved onto the free shoulder.

Massie looked at him disbelievingly. "Are you _fucking crazy?_ What the hell do you're think you're doing?"

Derrick smirked at her incredulous expression. "Like I said, _Block_," he said cockily, "I'm getting us out of traffic."

And with that, Derrick gunned his Mustang forward and exited onto a small off-track country road. Massie stared at him as the I-80 interstate shrunk before her. She glanced back onto his smug little face, as he drove over the bumpy country road smugly. "Harrington, are you _insane_? Didn't anyone ever tell you that the quickest way from point A to point B is to go in a _straight line_, which is done _using the fucking freeway_?"

"And we will use the freeway. Once we hit the I-81. It's less known than the I-80, and will have less traffic."

"INTERSTATE 81?" Massie screamed. "To take that freeway, we'd have to hit Binghamton."

"Exactly, we take the inner roads 'til we hit Binghamton, or if it's crowded taking that route, we'll exit into Scranton and take the I-84 and merge to the 81."

Massie took in a deep breath. "So, let me get this straight. We're going to take the _inner roads_," she asked, her voice hard and deadly, "with _stop signs, traffic lights, and speed limits_, because you are opposed to a little _TRAFFIC_?"

"A _little_ traffic? It was _fucking bumper-to-bumper_!"

"And if you had waited it out, for like three hours, it would've fucking disappeared! New York rush hour sucks, but once it's ten and rush hour's over; the freeway is clear as the freeways in fucking Idaho! You couldn't wait for a couple fucking hours?"

"I'm not sitting in fucking traffic, and we don't have to," Derrick answered, his tone much more relaxed. He glanced at the steaming brunette and smirked. "But hey, if you don't want to take the inner roads, feel free to walk."

"_Fuck you, Harrington__._" Massie snapped, her eyes flashing darkly.

**xxxxx**

Three hours later, Derrick was smugly cruising down the virtually empty I-81, much to the irritation of Massie. She could almost feel his condescendingly smug and arrogant eyes burning a hole through her body.

"Gee, I wonder where we'd be if we were still on the I-80. Oh, that's right, on the I-80," Derrick smirked, his voice dripping with superiority and conceit.

"_Oh, shut the __fuck__ up_," Massie snapped.

"Touchy, touchy," Derrick smirked haughtily, slowing the car as he neared an exit toward Cortland.

Massie looked at him exasperatedly. "Where the _fuck_ are you going now? FYI, Harrington, this is Cortland, not Ottawa," she snapped scathingly.

"I can see that, Block. Believe it or not, I passed kindergarten and can read," he retorted. "I need food, especially if I'm stuck in a car with you for the next forty-eight hours." Massie rolled her eyes irritatingly. "Hey, if you're going to whine about it, I'll even buy you something."

Massie glared at his arrogant bigheadedness. She _really _wanted to shoot him. Multiple times. With a many different types of guns and bullets."I'm _not_ hungry," she snapped through clenched teeth. "I'll be sure to tell your mother that you thought getting a hamburger was more important than finding Connor."

Derrick rolled his eyes as he pulled into the parking lot of a McDonald's. He sighed as he climbed out, slamming the door shut.

Massie sat in the car, arms crossed tightly. She watched Derrick take his long, loping strides across the parking lot, remembering the times when he was hers. The times when they would spend hours just lying side by side, talking or just lying in silence. The times when they would spend hours playing old board games and telling little secrets. The times when she found his cocky, _I'm-Derrick-Harrington-and-I'm-the-_shit attitude cute, even endearing. But the past was the past and although she truly cared about Derrick, it was way too painful being with his arrogant, self-centered, condescending bastard self.

Massie didn't even know why she liked him. He was cocky, egotistical, and always criticizing her and everyone else. In his eyes, he was perfect, and everyone else was just full of flaws. Everyone, especially Massie. It seemed as if Derrick was always analyzing her seemingly endless lists of faults. She was too selfish, too self-centered, too vain. Half the times, she felt like _shit_ from what Derrick said to her, felt like crying her heart out. So why the _hell_ in her right mind would she stay with him? Because the other half of the time, he was her rock, he was her shoulder to cry on, he was –

"Boo," Derrick cried, rapping on the windshield loudly.

Massie jumped out of her reverie and seat, and let out a loud yelp.

Derrick laughed his deep baritone laugh, smirking his famous Harrington smirk as he got inside the car.

"You're a _fucking ass_, Harrington."

"Aww, did I scare the big bad Massie Block?"

"Just shut up, and drive already."

"We have time," Derrick responded nonchalantly, opening a box and taking a big bite of his Big Mac sandwich, eyes glistening carelessly.

"Um, hello? Are brothers could be in Ottawa by now!"

"Relax, Block. I doubt the train can beat my baby Mustang. She's a beaut."

Massie scoffed and rolled her eyes, but settled back in her seat. "Oh, just shut your fatass up already and _drive_."

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**So, what'd you guys think of Chapter Two? Was is good, bad, ugly, horrible, or just a piece of "ass-shit," to quote Derrick Harrington… Wait, I wrote that…so wouldn't I be quoting myself? This got confusing. Can you tell it's four in the morning and I'm tired? xD**

**Anyway, please make my day and send me a review? Some virtual cookies would be nice too. :D**

**Love and smiles from, Faith. :D**


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